An open letter to the people of Alabama

Alabamians,

Please refrain from shooting at "Dukes of Hazzard"/"Smallville" star John Schneider. He is just a Good Ol' Boy who happens to be one of Superman's legal guardians.

Plus, Schneider was born in Westchester, which you and I know is the best, Chester!

Trust me, you don't want to make Clark Kent mad. He'll write a really scathing column about you in The Daily Planet.

Thank you,
Varsity Basketweaving.

(Via BestWeekEver.tv.)