Saturday, March 29, 2008

I have 4 songs whose genre iTunes automatically labels as 'Country'

"I'll Stand By You" by Carrie Underwood - Underwood does a fantastic job covering The Pretenders' classic. Purchased after last year's "Idol Gives Back" special, obviously.

"Hurt" by Johnny Cash - Waited far too long (last May) to buy this one.

"What Hurts The Most" by Rascal Flatts - One of the best ballads of the decade.

"Way Down In The Hole" by Steve Earle - The other versions featured as the theme to "The Wire" -- even the original by Tom Waits -- aren't comparable.

I just realized three of these country songs are covers of non-country songs. At least Rascal Flatts keeps me from being shut out from a purist's standpoint.

iTunes labels Chris Isaak's "Heart Shaped World" as "Pop," by the way.

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Paranoid road sign

LED sign seen this morning on the Sprain Brook Parkway:

"PLAN ALT. ROUTE."

The sign never changed as I drove by at the speed limit.

I kept waiting for it to rotate to another message:

"Y'KNOW. JUST IN CASE."

Friday, March 21, 2008

Oh, excuse me, Chris. I think you dropped this. It's another name.

Cool: Enjoying Kimberley Locke's run on Season 2 of "American Idol."
Cooler: Interviewing her yesterday for TV, print and the Web.
Coolest: Possible video evidence of "Cooler" on Wednesday's episode of "Idol." Stay tuned....

(Photo: Tania Savayan/The Journal News)

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Having trouble making your NCAA bracket picks? Look to none other than mascotologist Bobby Moynihan

My buddy Bobby's in a new ESPN commercial and it rocks.

I actually wrote a sports column a few years ago, justifying my NFL playoff picks with the same strategy:

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Hysterical hysteria

I attended last night's epic St. Patrick's Day Drunken Throwdown at New York's Upright Citizens Brigade Theatre and I'm still reeling from how crazy it was. And, no, I won't elaborate.

Props to sober hosts and The Stepfathers members Chris Gethard and Zach Woods, who were like tour guides alerting everyone to stay calm at a very drunk Jurassic Park.

Saturday, March 15, 2008

Either either

There are two accepted pronunciations for "either."

I use either.

Pizza Hut promotes attempt to make actual pizza

Today during a rerun of Vh1's "Celebrity Rehab" reunion special, I saw a commercial promoting Pizza Hut's Pizza Mia pie, made with "whole-milk mozzarella and sauce made from vine-ripened tomatoes."

Makes you wonder what's in their other pizzas, which are more closely related to the biscuit family.

To paraphrase the '80s jingle, "Pizza Huuut... Makin' Me Hate!"

Friday, March 14, 2008

I'd give up cursing, but that's ****ing hard

Among many friends who practice Catholicism to varying degrees, I was raised the same way. Perhaps you wouldn't know that. Sometimes I forget, myself.

A random element of Catholicism that I've adopted is either archaic or old-school, depending on what spin you want to throw on it: I do everything possible not to eat red meat or poultry on Fridays (and Ash Wednesday) during Lent. I've actually been successful at it the last two years and have just one more Friday to go before completing a third.

As much as I've resisted some church edicts (I'll spare you those politics; this isn't that kind of blog), I have serious respect for the discipline inherent in repeated and voluntary sacrifice. That's beautiful, spiritual and transcendent.

So sometimes one of my Catholic buddies will ask, "Hey, what'd you give up for Lent this year?" And I'll frown, because eating meat on Fridays is what I'm giving up for Lent.

Before you judge me, innocent stone-casters, please realize this is rough for a guy who doesn't like seafood except for tuna -- and only when it's from a can and obliterated among mayo, pepper and vinaigrette -- and thinks the four food groups are akin to those mentioned in that old John Belushi/"Saturday Night Live" sketch: "Cheeburger, Cheeburger, Cheeburger, (and) Cheeburger."

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Dream theater

This morning's sequence of events:

- Dreaming about an elusive, long-lost crush.

- Awakening to Dave Matthews' "Where Are You Going?", whose first words are the title.

- Listening to the next song, John Mayer's "Dreaming With A Broken Heart."

- Focusing on those first lyrics: "When you're dreaming with a broken heart/The waking up is the hardest part."

Clearly, my satellite radio has telepathy.

Saturday, March 08, 2008

Six appeal

This weekend, I'm only attending the birthday parties of friends who have six-letter last names.

I suppose I'm a bit biased.

Tuesday, March 04, 2008

Unpopular ways to die in 'Tom Clancy's Splinter Cell'

- Emphysema

- Food poisoning

- Paper cut infection

- Trampled by elephant

- Those guys shooting at you