The greatest move in the history of wheelbarrow races

Not that it's a long list, but thanks to GorillaMask's keen research skills, we definitely have a winner.

Something witty to say when the holiday season gets you down

Harumph-a-pum-pum.

Quotes from a 105-year-old woman I interviewed today

Q: How are you?

A: "I'm still alive!"

Q: How can a person live to 105?

A: "You just go on living and tell yourself, 'I'll never say I can't do it.'"

Q: Will the 106th birthday party be even bigger?

A: "I live by the day. I don't plan anything ahead, because I'm here but maybe the Lord will take me away all of a sudden. So I don't plan for any other birthday. But I am happy that I can do what I do now. If I can continue for a while, I'm thankful."

Here's the whole story, but if you ask me, you just read everything you need to know.

Why Amy Adams is Hollywood's next It girl

You want recent success? She's in the No. 1 movie at the box office.

You want funny? She's not only Ricky Bobby's clumsy inspiration in "Talledega Nights" but also the title character of "Hot Girl" in a Season 1 episode of "The Office."

You want quality? She's an Academy Award nominee. Really!

You want a hot redhead? Since Lindsay Lohan's gone cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs, what's stopping Adams and Isla Fisher from taking over?

Ebony and Irony

What's next? A Sports Illustrated cover story about the WWF?

Al Roker gets his Scrant-on

For once in my life, I wish I were in Scranton, Penn.

Al Roker's day in ‘The Office’

I still favor Joe Girardi for the Yankees' managerial position, but he'll never make a poster as cool as this

If Don Mattingly gets the job and commits as much to it as he did for this poster and his cameo on "The Simpsons," the Yanks will win 10 consecutive World Series.

Just when I thought I was too old for Halloween costumes

My friend Eugene alerted me to this video of costumes that are so uncool they're phenomenal. They are, of course, more than meets the eye:

Of course, I'm also dying to see how these guys "transform" when they're drunk. That's a good way to bust an axle.

Some WireImage photos just make me smile

And this is one of them:
I'm not sure what Samuel L. and McLovin had to say to one another, but at the very least I hope it involved a common interest in superfluous cursing.

Only the Power Glove ages worse than this 'Legend of Zelda' rap

I remember this Nintendo commercial being awful WHEN I WAS 7 YEARS OLD. It's much, much worse now:

Three subtle things to listen for:

1. The way spiky-haired boy neglects to separate lines into distinct sentences, opting for a flat reading of both in one breath. "Nice graphicside like to get my hands on that game."
2. "Wiki wiki wig!"
3. "Your parents help you hook it up, (stupid)."

No comment

In a failed attempt to re-install peek-a-boo comments on this blog, I somehow deleted your ability TO comment on this blog. Ugh.

Hopefully I can fix this before the end of the weekend. Thanks for your patience.

In the meantime, if you're frustrated, leave a... oh, wait, you can't.

UPDATE: Fixed! Hopefully, I'll have peek-a-boo comments soon.

Welcome to a landmark you never intended to visit

Why does the massive sign "Welcome to the Throgs Neck Bridge" exist at its tolls?

Almost no one ever considers a bridge a destination, unless he or she plans to either a) fish or b) jump off it.

Did wildlife and game and euthanasia lobbyists unite to pressure the MTA into this display? What tourism board thinks this is a bright idea? Are postcards available? I need to know these things.

Theories welcome. I'm genuinely stumped.

Hi. I do blog sometimes.

If you think it's been a while since I've blogged with consistency on THIS blog, just imagine if you're a poor fan of Headline Punchline. (Remember that blog? Evidently neither did I until today.)

Anyway, sorry about that. To upgrade the mood to a more celebratory one, I just realized the previous post was No. 500 in VB's history. I'm happy that it involves such relevant, thought-provoking footage in a turbulent time such as this.

Kittens do cute things

Like attempt to eat corn on the cob, for example:

UPDATE: This is Varsity Basketweaving's 500th post! Huzzah!

Paul Shaffer, Movie Monster

This undoctored footage from this season of "The Sopranos" gets funnier with every view. I present to you "Paul Shaffer, Movie Monster."

Whoever uploaded it also wrote a brilliant caption: "Paul Shaffer laughs at your heartache."