Anch300rman

This mash-up is not as good as The Office/Nelly, but is anything? Nonetheless, anytime Steve Carell's riding a bear, I'm on board:

I hate you

No, not you, the loyal VB reader. The guy behind me right now at Panera in Yorktown, the loudest sandwich chewer on the face of the earth. Gross.

Barney's film had heart, but 'Football in the Groin' had a football in the groin

Sports bloopers work on so many levels!

Max Martin uses 'U + Ur Hand' to rip off... himself?

Now, I generally appreciate Pink and her grrrl-power ways, but something about her most recent hit single had been bothering me for months. I knew "U + Ur Hand" sounded waaay too much like another recent song.

Then, while listening to it in my car on the way home today, it hit me: It's a carbon copy of the Veronicas' "4Ever."

I mean, it's blatant, right down to the title's substitution of single-letter representations of full words. Here's audio proof, courtesy of some brilliant cat named Shard. (One or two curses in here. You've been warned.)

Via Google, I just learned through The Ink Blog's Jason Chatfield that Max Martin -- the pop god himself -- wrote both songs. As Chatfield puts it, "unless he sues himself, there’s no big deal about it."

Jason's A/V proof, with commentary:


A different YouTube version of the same mash-up:

The only difference? The Veronicas' version practically begs the object of their affection to go home with them, while Pink just wants him to go home.

To add insult to injury, Pink's spoken "I know you're talking s***, but you're going home alone, arent'cha?" is also reminiscent of the unimpressed quips of Shania Twain's "That Don't Impress Me Much" (i.e. "OK, so you're Brad Pitt.").

MySpace: Forcing bulletin readers to reply or kill

Ever read a MySpace bulletin? When you're done, just beneath the text sit two buttons:

• Reply To Poster
• Delete From Friends

True, you could always keep scrolling down, or scroll back up, to click links that would give you alternate options. But I like the idea that your friends' seemingly benign words, displayed in bulletin form, potentially could terminate your (online) friendship.

After all, if said (written?) words have merit on any level, why wouldn't you want to reply with a "Yes, I'd love to see your band!" or a "Wow, that sux about ur bf"? (Perhaps even with full words! Spelled correctly!)

And, subliminally, perhaps MySpace is encouraging posters to think wisely about what they post -- lest an angry/sleep-deprived/bored "Friend" decide that their musings are not just unimportant, but so awful that the only logical action is to completely remove them from HisSpace/HerSpace.

Mr. Darwin, I believe you and MySpace have been acquainted. The Top Friends function already exudes "survival of the fittest."

Janie's got a gun... WHAT is the DEAL with THAT?

Didja ever notice how the opening bass riff to Aerosmith's "Janie's Got A Gun" has the same synthetic bassline as the opening to "Seinfeld"?

"Janie's got a gun? Janie's got a gun? Now HOW did JANIE, exactly... get that gun? Did she cut school to get a license first? Did she then hold up the truancy officer with it so that she could get away with both crimes? I mean, if Janie's got a gun, that changes everything. That chemistry teacher's bumping up Janie's grade now. Suddenly, that covalent bond definition looks good enough."

No, thank you

Seen on my MySpace bulletin board, as posted by someone else:

"Please read. This is awful."

No, thank you.

Other bulletin board headings I'd be slow to read:

"You are a jerk."
"Survey of why Varsity Basketweaving is bad."
"Sad puppies"

Forget the Final Four. It's all about the Frozen Four.

Boston College has made it into the semifinals of the NCAA hockey championship. Their first-round opponent? None other than fierce non-conference rival North Dakota.

The last time these two faced off in a Frozen Four final, this happened to clinch the championship:

Maybe it's just because BC fields (ices?) a better men's hockey team year-to-year than any other revenue-generating sport at the university, but I really enjoy watching great college hockey if BC's playing. The sport feels faster and more exciting than the National Hockey League, especially because every game in the national college tournament is win-or-go-home (versus a best-of-five or best-of-seven series in the NHL).

Here's hoping for more BC glory, starting April 5.

March 26: The mood remains 'HAPPI,' the year remains 'NEW'

We're about to enter April, and spring is officially here, but the people at this Yonkers Friendly's branch continue to enjoy the pursuit of "HAPPI"ness and the newness of 2007.

Five things I can't believe were said during last night's episode of "Pros vs. Joes"

I don't think these "Pros vs. Joes" competitors really meant to say these things:

"I'm going to bust that 170-pound, dripping wet a**." ~Andre Reed, referring -- I hope -- to a light-weight contestant's ENTIRE body weight if it were soaking wet. Otherwise, gross.

"How many people can say they got a ball in the face from Darryl Strawberry?" ~University of Wisconsin student/mascot who was bloodied after a pop-up cut his chin.

During "Pros Vs. Joes" commercial breaks, I was astounded at how lazy advertising copy has become:

"... must-own DVDs. Now on DVD." Yeah, those episodes of "Batman Beyond" and "Justice League Unlimited" were so awesome when they were on DVD. But "now" that they're on DVD, that's even better.

"... an all-new season of Ultimate Fighter 5." It's an amazing coincidence that the first four seasons were also called "Ultimate Fighter 5."

"... on the next all-new episode of 'Bullrun'! Encore next." Everything new is old again.

We'll miss you, Bud

Calvert DeForest, a.k.a. Larry "Bud" Melman from the Letterman shows on NBC and CBS, died Monday.

Saddest fact in this CNN story: "There will be no funeral service for DeForest, who left no survivors."

A quick story on the significance of DeForest in my humble life: When I was a high-schooler, I caught my first episode of "Late Night with David Letterman." All I can recall was a segment in which DeForest was chasing after a cheesecake that was dangling in front of him on a wire. As he crept across the stage, he kept repeating the phrase "Dave, I want the cheesecake!" and my friend Chris Tormey and I couldn't stop laughing at what we saw. I've been a Letterman fan ever since.

Remind me to pour out a 40 today in Bud's honor. Seemed like a nice man.

New Heroes, new Web site

In celebration of the three new members of my New York City vocal band, we've revamped Unsung Heroes' Web site. And there was much rejoicing.

Justin Timberlake's heart 'bleeded,' a sequel was born

Chubby Checker had "The Twist" and "Let's Twist Again." Metallica had "Unforgiven" and "Unforgiven II." Now, Justin Timberlake has "Cry Me A River" and "What Goes Around/Comes Around."

Basically these two JT songs have the same feel (you can sing the chorus of "Cry Me A River" along to the chorus of "What Goes Around..." without it clashing) and message (You cheated, you're sorry, tough crap, I've moved on), except the latter has a sitar riff, a transition that tacks on a few more minutes and the word "bleeded (sic)."

Oof.

For "bleeded" alone, I want to give the earlier song the edge, but right now, I can't stop listening to the newer of the two. It's that addictive.

I'm not going to lie; I'm somewhat embarrassed about my appreciation for Justin Timberlake's music. But the guy's talented. He sings some killer songs. And he's probably the closest thing to an uncreepy Michael Jackson the music world has these days.

Oh, and he might have tagged Scarlett Jo.

If you want some circumstantial evidence of this and have 10 minutes to burn, enjoy the following (There are some curse words in here, young'ns. So by clicking play you swear that you're of suitable age, blah blah blah):

Bleeded! Bleeded! Bleeded!

I like this commercial. Also, it reminds me that I have to get back to the gym.

It's easy to dump on bad commercials (read: most of them). But I find this low-key one endearing:

Maybe it's the fact that Derek Jeter's in it. That helps, but it's primarily because I love how charming the woman is.

This commercial works on every level: product name recognition and purpose, protagonist, music, message and realism. Nice job, Propel.

Looking out for his fellow nerds

Without giving too much away (just in case you haven't heard by now), I think the "Jeopardy!" returning champion, Scott Weiss, could have done something more to prevent this from happening, but wanted to let at least one of his competitors walk away with some cash:

And of course, I use the term "nerds" in only the most complimentary sense. I only wish I could be so smart, having to settle for the term "nerdy" at best.