'New Jersey: Most of Our Elected Officials Have Not Been Indicted.'

This post title was an actual submission for a New Jersey slogan contest. The winning entry, "New Jersey: Come See For Yourself," while more appropriate, doesn't quite have the pinache of another actual nominee: "New Jersey: You Got a Problem With That?"

Here are five more I would have submitted:

5. "New Jersey: New York, But Not Quite."
4. "New Jersey: We're Bon Jovial!"
3. "New Jersey: Eating Pennsylvania, Pac-Man Style, Since 1787."
2. "New Jersey: LOOK OUT!!!!!"
1. "New Jersey: We Know What That Smell Is."

Kidding. Lots of sweet people I know are from Jersey, including my girlfriend. But she does know what that smell is: Usually, it's me.